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Once again we’re at the end of another year. What a mixed bag of days it’s been. While I didn’t select a word for 2019, I feel like I gained a wealth of happiness from my chosen family. I brought new friends into the fold, strengthened my relations with others, and had many wonderful moments to fill my bucket through this turbulent year.

I returned to Facebook this year. Keeping it mostly on a leash by visiting only the groups and the pages I administer.

Two things remained consistent through this year: doing a daily card draw and listening to my body. Still hitting the gym, still seeing my chiropractor and massage therapist. In December, I stepped up my gym game by going four times a week and at 6:30 in the morning. I’m still working on trying to keep the pace up, but it does give me a sense of structure to my days which I desperately crave.

With all this said, here’s a longer rundown of the good, the bad, and the accomplishments of 2019. Enjoy the commentary and corresponding images from my year.

The Good

My partner, kendra, came out as a trans woman this year. Her journey has been amazing to watch and the transformation she’s stepped into is breathtaking. She’s much more vibrant, happy, and light now that she can express her true nature. I’m so proud of my wife. We have a loving and supportive community of chosen friends which makes this all the better.

Visited Massachusettes for the first time. Stayed with my wonderful friend Carolyn Cushing. She drove me around the Valley and I got to visit Emily Dickenson’s grave and home. Her poetry had an early influence on my writing. We also did a one day tarot and writing retreat which was well received by the attendees.

Visited St. Louis, Missouri for the first time. Stayed with Melissa Cynova. Taught a class at the Cardslingers Thingy and got a new tarot tattoo of the moon on my arm. Between this and singing in the car for hours with Melissa and Hilary, I have many great memories.

The counseling I receive weekly does wonders for me. Both my physical and mental health are doing better.

Witnessed Mary K Greer divine inspiration from my ouija underwear at NWTS. No, it’s NOT what you think. Okay, maybe it is? Email me for details.

Being an avid gym rat has helped me grow stronger. Helped friends move into a house in June and it felt good to be able to do much lifting.

Read 48 books this year. Doubled from last year. This was accomplished by restructuring my daily schedule and habits to spend more time reading at night.

The Bad

I am no-longer associating with my adoptive family. When kendra came out during pride in June we got nothing but negative feedback and spite. It’s a hard thing to do, but I cannot deal with the abuse any longer. My sights are set for better and my boundaries are getting stronger as a result.

Mid-way through the year our kitty, imoen, developed health issues. We took her to the hospital in August and discovered she had a tumor in her intestine. She went through surgery and was diagnosed with one (or two) cancers. She’s on steroids and chemo now, and we’re doing our best to make sure her final years are as comfortable, food plenty, and enjoyable.

It’s been hard to watch her go through this, as cancer has taken so many others from my life (people and pets). She’s a fighter and I am proud at how well this kitty is doing.

The Accomplishments

Started off the new year with my book, Tarot Inspired Life, being released to the public. I’ve gotten many wonderful reviews from friends and strangers and it’s amazing to see just how well everyone has understood the intention of the book. Huzzah!

I kept up with the amount of publicity for the book and my reading practice by doing events once every month. This is something which helped push me more into the public, and has been a good guideline for keeping my levels of stress down. I plan on doing my best to continue this idea throughout 2020.

Had my first book signing at the ALA Seattle conference. It was so much fun and all the books “sold” out quickly. I was also able to snag a few freebies, including the anticipated ARC of Chuck Wendig’s Wanderers (it’s sooo good).

I attended five conferences this year: PantheaCon 2019, NorthWest Tarot Symposium, Readers Studio, Beyond the Gates, and the Cardslingers Thingy. I taught classes at PantheaCon, NWTS, Beyond the Gates, and at the Cardslingers Thingy. Hung out with my peeps at Readers Studio.

In addition to having my book published, I also wrote the booklets for the Millennium Thoth, the Thelema Lenormand, and the Tarot Z tarot deck projects from Lo Scrabeo. Tarot Z was one of my favorite projects because it blended my love of tarot and zombies together. There are two editions, a regular edition and a limited edition box which reminds me of The Walking Dead. All three decks are out and you can purchase them at your local store or amazon.

I’m still podcasting with Rose Red under the Tarot Visions umbrella. We left our partner group in June and transferred services over to Spreaker. We hired kendra to make new music for our intro and outro. We also hosted our first two giveaways for tarot books and decks. We are still recording strong and have a lot coming in for 2020.

November saw me return to NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). This is a solo-writing competition which helps writers all over the world work on creating a first (aka shitty) first draft of a novel in 30 days. I participated in this project for over ten years and have many drafts. Tarot Inspired Life started life in this format. I returned this year because I wanted to write the first draft of my next tarot book. I’m not going to release any deets yet. However, I can say that I “won” with 50,222 words and I am still adding more words to reach a final total of 60,000.

2020 brings a new podcast featuring my voice. Melissa Cynova, Hilary Parry Haggerty and I started recording episodes for what will become Cardslingers Coast to Coast. After many tech issues and resolutions, the ‘cast comes at you on January 10, 2020. It’s a different tarot podcast than what Rose and I are doing, and I hope everyone enjoys it.

This about wraps 2019 up. With a few hours to spare. We’re having friends over tonight and later, I head out to read tarot at a local party. I look forward to 2020 and what the new year and decade bring into my life. 

How’d your year go? What did you do, where did you go, who did you see? What are you looking forward to in 2020? Let me know!

To recap, in 2019 I’m using these decks: Awakened Soul Oracle, the Luminous Tarot, and Mudras for Awakening: The Energy Body Deck. I chose them because they fit in with the idea of giving me a theme, a means to apply the theme, and a physical hand position to guide me into the lesson. This last card sits at my desk and helps remind me of my goals and gives me support when I need it.

Theme: Shadow
How: 3 of Wands
Helper: 28. Freedom

I love this Shadow card. When I first saw it, I couldn’t help but compare the image of the person with a mask on to the mask of the goddess Lilith I wore back in 2012 for a Fall Equinox Festival ritual. If you compare the card in the spread above to the image here, you’ll see exactly what I mean. Uncanny isn’t it? Anyway, Shadow is the theme for this month. December is traditionally a cold month where not much goes on. You can find me writing or reading, usually by a warm fireplace. The theme of shadow is to look at my shadow sides and do some work around it. Time to shine the light in the remaining dark corners of my psyche, and see what comes up. What more about myself can I learn during the cold, sleep month?

The 3 of Wands describes how I’ll set about doing this. I usually think of this card as the future visioning card. It gives me the ability to look at where I’ve come, what I want to do, and how to see the path between the two dots. Illuminating the dark spots and shadows is very beneficial for visioning work because it gives us new ways of seeing where we may hold ourselves back. So, I need to be more objective in my thinking and understand how the resistances or shadow sides both help and hinder where I want to go. The image shows a triangle, setting boundaries necessary to create containers for the future. The triangular shape also echoes the mask in the Shadow card, too.

The final mudra is Freedom. This helper assists in being open and brings balance to the body. Freedom is a goal for examining our shadow sides. We want to be free of old beliefs and patterns that no longer support us. Being able to thank these darker sides and let them go, gives us space to bring in new helpers and new patterns. I love that this mudra creates the space and balance for doing shadow work. It’ll be a great helper to use when the resistance arises. I’ll also incorporate this mudra into my morning and evening rituals.

And this closes the 2019 series on using tarot (and oracle cards) to help guide you through a year’s worth of planning and going deeper in your life. I have grown to enjoy the three card monthly spreads and already know which three decks I’ll be using for 2020! Wow… it’s hard to believe 2020 is only a month away.

Do you have any cool year-long planning spreads or ideas? Let me know, I’m always on the lookout for new spreads to try.

To recap, in 2019 I’m using these decks: Awakened Soul Oracle, the Luminous Tarot, and Mudras for Awakening: The Energy Body Deck. I chose them because they fit in with the idea of giving me a theme, a means to apply the theme, and a physical hand position to guide me into the lesson. This last card sits at my desk and helps remind me of my goals and gives me support when I need it.

Theme: Authenticity
How: 3 of Cups
Helper: 25. Brilliance

Coming out of the deep work I’ve done over the last few months comes Authenticity. This theme asks me to consider all the parts that make up me, and really live all of them to their fullest powers. Accept who I am, and what I offer, and bring this into the forefront of everything. Ethony’s booklet says, “Accepting yourself is one of the greatest, most freeing gifts you can have in life. Allow yourself to be who you really are and live your life to the fullest.” Living a true authentic life is hard to do. It means you go about your business without giving thought to what most others may think. It means acting in accordance to the morals and guides you create for yourself. I love that this theme comes out of a deeper examination of some of the building blocks of what creates an authentic life.

The 3 of Cups teaches me how I can live an authentic life this month. I look at this card as a celebration of all that I love and cherish. Being able to feel a deep passion for people and ideas helps me live authentically because it supports the choices in life. I can honor the abundance in my life and know the bonds I have with everything help guide me. Not everything has to mean something, sometimes it’s good to celebrate life as it is.

Brilliance is the mudra helper. It assists in radiance and focus. If living an authentic life means to share and shine your gifts with others and the world, then this mudra can help that light I carry shine. I’ll incorporate this mudra into my morning and evening rituals.

To recap, in 2019 I’m using these decks: Awakened Soul Oracle, the Luminous Tarot, and Mudras for Awakening: The Energy Body Deck. I chose them because they fit in with the idea of giving me a theme, a means to apply the theme, and a physical hand position to guide me into the lesson. This last card sits at my desk and helps remind me of my goals and gives me support when I need it.

Theme: Mantra
How: Ace of Swords
Helper: 19. Commitment

This month I’ll be looking at what mantras I speak to myself. A mantra is a repetition of word(s) we say over and over again. Mantras are usually associated in spiritual systems. I like how Ethony broadens the idea of mantras to include the repetitions of ideas, or saying, we tell ourselves. She says, “You are being urged to use positive and kind words about yourself and when you talk about yourself.” Words have power, they really do. And to have this theme come after the notion of Truth is a powerful and positive reminder of the power of words. I am horrible when it comes to praise and kindness to myself. I have a hard time treating myself in the same way I treat others. Therefore, I see myself learning to rewrite, overwrite, and generally learn how to be the best friend to myself. Time to craft new words for myself.

How I’ll be doing this is in the Ace of Swords. I see the Ace of Swords as the seed to new ideas, new ways of thinking. It will help me craft these kind mantras for myself. Brainstorm new ways to make these habits hold and give me the power to create clear directions. I love the image in this deck. The sword is growing out of the third eye, almost as a beacon for others to see. People sense energy patterns. If I can rewrite the mantras I project out to the world, maybe I can learn to live more truthfully.

Commitment is October’s mudra. This helper card aids in determination and focus. It takes a lot of willpower and desire to overcome old patterns. I’ll be needing this position to boost the desire and focus for examining my mantras. Again, I see some synchronicity in with the other cards of this spread. I’ll also incorporate this mudra into my morning and evening rituals.